Monday, July 11, 2016

Make it Happen on Purpose...

I just read an article written by a man who is 46 years old. I don't recall the exact details but what he wrote was a desperate cry out to anyone who might be wasting time postponing their lives, their dreams, their chance at love, their goals just to be financially sound and then start living.

He was very explicit as to how it turned out for him. Basically what happened is that he dedicated more time to his career and his work than he did to his son and his wife, so about 10 years ago the wife decided that she felt lonely and took on a lover, so she was having the life of a wife, a mother and a lover. It took him ten years to realize he had lost his wife and now that he realized it he said why did I waste all that time trying to build up a future so we could enjoy life as a family and now that I have the financial security I have no family to enjoy it with.

Even though I could see desperation for his loss and how sorry he was that he didn't realize it sooner, I don't really know how much sooner, maybe 15 years ago? I can also see it from the other side of the river.

In my experience and looking at it as something practical. First as a woman myself and having had that same experience, I was the wife of the Doctor, the caretaker, teacher, volunteer, housewife,  cook, housekeeper, gardener, pet caretaker, driver, lover and friend. I set the woman in me aside, I had no time for that, I didn't resent that my spouse was out building our economic future while I was building our family and even though I do consider having done a great job on my side, I still found myself alone at 50 and wondering why!?

To me finding myself at the total opposite end of where I thought I would wind up with the effort I decided to put into raising a family sent me on a whirlwind of emotions, that prompted me to make decisions that I never ever thought I could or would. It was as if giving myself permission to do everything wrong this time, because doing it right as I thought I was, certainly had not brought me the results I expected.

Well of course after a while of making all the wrong decisions I realized that wasn't the path either. That if I wanted to enjoy being alive rather than just existing that I had to do things in a totally different way and I set out to find which way that made sense to me and brought me the most peace and harmony. At this stage you realize that you just have to find that peace and harmony and everything else falls into place.

Right now when I read the rants of this poor 46 year old man with nothing but financial stability I think to myself, I tell you what, you give me the financial stability you have and I will show you how to enjoy your life. You are only 46 years old you still have such a long and wonderful road ahead of you. Maybe it'll be with other people to give your love to and who will love everything about you without the need to go behind your back to love another.

I don't know, I wish I was 46 and had the financial stability that you have, just go out and find happiness again in all that you have and all that you are. It's a wonderful life adventure you just have to go... Make it Happen on Purpose...

Hugs xoxo

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