Monday, February 4, 2008

Wanna come White Water River Rafting with Me?


Five years ago I couldn’t figure out if my life was about to end, or about to begin. I had so little energy left to deal with the many obstacles and challenges I had ahead of me that I couldn’t seem to make sense out of the madness. But since I was still breathing, and somewhat excited with the thought that maybe, just maybe, I could still fulfill my last dreams, I decided I had to do something about the way I was looking at my life, and try to turn it into a game, an adventure.

At first I picked the game that matched the feelings I had inside, so I could make the game believable for me, and since I feel like I am living in a “Science Fiction World,” in my game I saw myself having all these extra-terrestrials sending me tasks to do with a lot of challenges, and if I didn’t accomplish the task right, or even if they were just in a playful mood, they’d throw meteors that I was supposed to dodge. In the meantime, I’m here on Earth, on the California freeways, trying to make sure the cars that drive by at 80+ mph don’t hit me, while I run across back and forth avoiding the darn meteors.

I don’t know, maybe it’s all those realistic looking video games that my son has been playing for years, but that’s the way I felt about my life at the time.

So as you can imagine, even though I was managing to move forward in spite of the chaos, I wasn’t doing it without lots of scratches and bumps, not to mention the many negative emotions like fear, disappointment, anger, stress, amongst others. So after all the mistakes I was still making, I decided I needed to change the game I was playing. It still had to be credible to me or it would feel like a lie, but it also needed to feel exhilarating and adventuresome, so that the otherwise negative emotions could become positive to help me move forward faster.

Now I’m becoming much more familiar with White Water River Rafting. I’m still not fully on the driver’s seat, but I help steer with one hand, while grabbing on with the other, and it’s definitely getting to be a lot more fun.

Once we can realize that no matter how many challenges come our way, we can only take care of one thing at a time, that if we stress it makes things even harder, and that if we trust that we are still going to stay afloat, that even if sometimes it feels that the raft might tilt, we can still get back on it, then we can see that anytime now, maybe even on the very next turn, there is a serene lake where we can just float for a while, maybe do some fishing, enjoy the sun, the peaceful setting, the scents and the sounds, until we decide what game we’d like to play next.


 'Life is an Adventure' make yours a fun one!

Hugs xoxo
@nit@

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

white water rafting, love it! And sometimes falling off and free floating is kinda funnn